Last week, I had a chat with our 16-year-old about his plans for studying for his final exams…here’s the lesson I learned during that chat:
After asking him to share his plans with me he remarked, “Dad, you only care about the grades on my report card, because it makes you look good!”
OUCH!
Yeah…that stung! Then, I took a deep breath. Next, I acknowledged that I understood how he could feel that way. Lastly, I shared that I cared about his grades because I have a responsibility for how he turns out, but not for the reason he thinks. In fact, I didn’t start to figure this out until I was in my 40s.
I shared with him that what I figured-out is that it’s NOT for me to look good as a parent – that’s called vanity. I care about his grades because I have a responsibility for how he turns-out in all vocations of his life. His progress as a student is just one of his vocations. In other words, how he turns-out as a whole person is my report card – that’s called fraternal humility.
Vanity and fraternal humility may look the same from the outside, but the vibe is different. Vanity feels selfish, but fraternal humility feels selfless and it’s a complete flip in thinking about how to measure leadership in all of your vocations, not just your vocation as a parent.
How are you serving others AND drawing greatness out of them at the same time? Does this vibe feel different to you? Is this measurement of leadership a bigger idea than how you were taught? It was for me.
And a short, honest conversation with my son suddenly made it real in a whole new way.
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Read MoreThe Authentic Leadership Foundation is excited to announce that five-time MLB All-Star and Kansas City Royals Hall of Famer Mike Sweeney will be the keynote speaker at our Bring Out the Greatness 2024! event on December 9. Known for his integrity and dedication both on and off the field, Sweeney embodies authentic leadership, mentoring young athletes as a special assistant to the Royals’ GM and inspiring others through his work with the San Diego Saints and the Mike and Shara Sweeney Family Foundation. Join us for an evening of inspiration as Mike shares his insights on leading with humility, integrity, and purpose, helping all of us bring out our own greatness.
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